Today, six years ago, I sat on my bed in my room with headphones plugged in my ears nice and sweet, and started writing my very first post on this very blog. I think it is quite fitting that I am home today to celebrate six years of being a blogger.
This blog has seen it all… It has been the perfect sounding board for my vents and frustrations, and an eager ear for all the excitement I couldn’t contain within myself. From a frustrated MCA student just dipping my toes in the world of blogging and then realizing that drowning myself in words is the only way to find release, my voyage started. This blog held my hand and told me it was okay to be nervous and excited and painfully happy in love as I prepared to get married, and when I reached Vietnam as a wide-eyed newly wed, it gave me company during lonely days. From Vietnam to Malaysia and then to Singapore, as I moved from country to country, growing older and wiser (one hopes), this blog has stayed right by my side. And even after abandoning it for a whole year while I absorbed motherhood with everything I had, it didn’t give up on me.
It seems a little weird maybe, to talk about a blog as an entity, but when you identify yourself as a writer, your blog kinda becomes the window to your soul. Honestly though, it is my saved drafts, the unpublished posts that I hold dearest to my heart. Something about a lost trail of thought is so unique… I mean, you can try to pick up the trail but unless you are in the same state of mind as when you started (which you rarely are, let’s be honest), it is near impossible to keep track of just where and why it got lost. So when I read my drafts, I surrender myself to the lost trail, knowing very well that those unfinished posts will always represent a certain state of mind that I can never recreate consciously.
As for the posts that did make it on the blog, I sometimes wonder why I ever had the illusion that each thought that appeared in my head was a pearl of wisdom that needed to be documented. But that’s how one grows with a blog I guess. From creating posts out of nothing with a flourish that was a side-effect of trying really hard to show off an expansive vocabulary to weighing my words to make sure they conveyed exactly what I had in mind, nothing more and nothing less, to just letting go and not really thinking too much… this blog has been a witness through all without judgement.
I can’t express in words (oh the irony!) just how relieved I am to be writing more, and writing more often. To be honest, the Facebook page has kept me on my toes, because it represents a commitment that I hope to keep for a long, long time. Someday, some wonderful day, when I have a book to call my own, my blog will be testimony to the rocky beginnings and keep me grounded (ah, but a woman can dream…!) Keeping it short and sweet tonight, because any further and the words will come dripping with emotion I am not yet ready to make public.
To blogging, then! Cheers!